It hit me while making dinner last night - "What the Frak am I doing?" I'm not designed to be a business owner. I'm designed to research and write. I can't handle the stress of invoicing and asking for late payments. I'm stretched so thin with husband and kids and home and work... It doesn't turn off.
I really thought I could do this... I really thought that I would be ok. Honestly, right now, I want a job with a desk and a time clock and a regular salary, maybe a few benefits. Even though I've been running my business for 4 months now, I've still be applying for jobs. I had one company interview me three times, but then wouldn't return my calls after practically offering me the job in the interview (I mean, how else would you interpret "Let us know when you're ready to move and we'll help you get situated). I get it, I didn't get the job - at least tell me yourself.
I don't know if I can do this, how much longer I can keep going. I'm tired of "oh yea, I'll hire you" but then never get a return call or anything. I think it's funny how immediately after meeting with me a business will make a few posts on their Facebook page, then don't post again for a while. Clearly, you do need me.
I'm just so scared, because so many things fall on my shoulder, and if this fails, it's not just me that's affected...
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