Mixing Work and Home Life

One of the hardest things that I have to deal with as a business owner is that I’m not just a business owner.  I’m also a mom.  

I don’t have a job that I can leave the office and the work stays there.  The office is my home, and my work is 24/7.  

I generally keep a rule that 9a-3p and after 8 until I can’t stay awake I am in work mode.  But that doesn’t always happen.  I’ll get a phone call that will last 45 minutes at 4, or something will need my attention for one of my clients.  It’s tough.

I still haven’t found that balance yet.  I try to get up a bit earlier every day (I’m not a morning person, so that doesn’t happen too often).  

I spend the 8-9a hour getting house stuff done while I’m shipping the girls off to school, before I take my son to preschool.  I’m thankful that he’s such a good boy, because the 2 days when he’s not in school, he plays with his toys, sits with me and colors while I work and stays quiet when I’m on the phone.

The past month he’s been sick - a lot.  It made my days difficult, because when my husband was in clinicals, I had to cancel my meetings.  Most people understand, but there's a few who don’t get it.  

I enjoy working freelance, it gives me freedom.  But sometimes, I just wish I had an office that I could go to, get my work done then go home... Something that I could do from home when the kids are sick.  

Maybe I need to just get an office of my own, outside of the house.  There needs to be a separation between work and play.  I have a few other work-from-home friends, they all have their own “work mode” and “play mode” ideas to differentiate when their working and when they’re not.  For me, if the high-heels are on, I’m working.  

But then I fall into the ‘networking no-no’.  I’ve been told several times that when I leave my house, it’s always an opportunity to be building my business, so I need to look the part at all times - make-up, no ponytail, name tag on.  However, I love to just go sit at a coffee shop in a hoodie and jeans and get some work done, it gets me out of the house and I’m comfortable.  I know, I know, ‘if you were to run into that person you’ve been wanting to meet with’...

Sigh...  It gets easier at some point, right?

My kids in cartoon form

The Germs Have Taken Over - And I've Waved The White Flag

My son has been sick of most of the last 4 weeks.  It's not been anything serious enough for the doctor to give him meds, but with a gross runny nose and fevers every other day, he's not been in preschool for almost a month.

When he finally got better, we sent him back.

And he brought home the flu.

And shared it with all of us.

So now is Day 5.  He got it first, then S, then me, then Steve, then E.

Now, 5 days later, Steve and I still aren't feeling well, while the kids are running around like maniacs!

We've Lysol, bleached, and steam cleaned EVERYTHING.  Which doesn't help my headache or nausea w/ the strong smells...

So I've embraced that I'm sick; I've used that time to focus on me.  I slept.  I watched movies.  I read 3 books on my Kindle.  (The Hunger Games Trilogy - I'll write a review later)


So here it is at day 5, and at least I'm out of bed and able to get some work done.  I suppose that's one of the benefits of working from home.

So while I sit writing, my hubby is resting on the couch, and my son is kicking butt on Wii Bowling.  Maybe tomorrow everything will go back to normal.  Today, I'll enjoy some quite time.

Help Me Pick My New Hair!

So, I'm going through an identity crisis.  It's kinda frustrating.  I don't fee comfortable in my own skin.  Ok, it's REALLY frustrating.

I've been trying out some new Mary Kay skin care products to write a review for my blog.  So far so good.

I bought some new clothes, clothes that actually fit me since I lost weight.

I'm due for new glasses soon, too.

Now, it's time to change my hair!

So this is what I look like now:

This is what I'm thinking about:

This Hair Style

Color Style #1

Color Style #2

So please dear reader - help me pick!

Sometimes we just need a break...

I love my kids - they are polite, kind, funny, smart, and down right awesome!

But sometimes we all need a break, some time to ourselves.

Due to my husband's school and work schedule, we don't get as much time with him.  We see him in the morning and have breakfast together, we see him on the weekends, but that's about it.  So I'm 'single mom' Monday-Friday between 3:30 and bedtime.  Most days it's not a problem, we get everything done and we all go to bed happy.

But some days... not so much.  I generally conduct my business 9-3 Monday through Friday, and then after the kids go to bed until I can't stay awake any longer.  Unfortunately, I spend so much time with work and kids, there isn't any time left over for me.  And some days I just need a break.

I know, I know, I'm only able to be a good mom if I take care of myself first.  But that's a lot easier said than done.  I don't get to read for fun anymore, it's all for research.  So I'm very thankful for audio books, my entertainment while doing chores.  I'll don't know when I'll have time again to sit and read a book for enjoyment.  I don't watch that much TV,  just movies on the weekend with the kids.

I don't remember ever feeling this guilty before - I never wanted to be a working mom, let alone a business owner.  Does it ever get easier?

Regardless of how stressed I feel today, I know the hugs and love of my kids will knock me out of this funk...

Me and my crazy kids! 

Can I really do this?

It hit me while making dinner last night - "What the Frak am I doing?"  I'm not designed to be a business owner.  I'm designed to research and write.  I can't handle the stress of invoicing and asking for late payments.  I'm stretched so thin with husband and kids and home and work... It doesn't turn off.

I really thought I could do this... I really thought that I would be ok.  Honestly, right now, I want a job with a desk and a time clock and a regular salary, maybe a few benefits.  Even though I've been running my business for 4 months now, I've still be applying for jobs.  I had one company interview me three times, but then wouldn't return my calls after practically offering me the job in the interview (I mean, how else would you interpret "Let us know when you're ready to move and we'll help you get situated).  I get it, I didn't get the job - at least tell me yourself.

I don't know if I can do this, how much longer I can keep going.  I'm tired of "oh yea, I'll hire you" but then never get a return call or anything.  I think it's funny how immediately after meeting with me a business will make a few posts on their Facebook page, then don't post again for a while.  Clearly, you do need me.

I'm just so scared, because so many things fall on my shoulder, and if this fails, it's not just me that's affected...